The Randoms of Marriage

When you get married, people love to give you advice. I was totally cool with that – in fact I was quite open to it. I loved to hear the insights people had, no matter how long they’d been married. We were told to be silly together, we were told that the first year would be the hardest (that was NOT the case for us), we were told never to go to bed angry, and that sometimes it’s okay to go to bed angry because you’ll wake up with a different outlook  - just to name a few. I took all those tidbits in and stored them away, pulling them out when necessary. But, as we settled into our married status, I found there was a LOT that no one tells you.

No one tells you how personally you will take it when your spouse has a bad day and unintentionally takes it out on you. No one tells you that when your alarm is set for 6am, your husband will roll onto his back and snore like a lumberjack at 5:45. No one tells you that sometimes you will feel like you are on different planets when you are discussing current events, or money, or overall outlooks on things. And no one tells you that when your spouse isn’t happy, finding your own happiness becomes increasingly difficult.

However, you know what else no one tells you? No one tells you that you’ll be so madly, deeply in love that you count the minutes until you get to go home and be in the same room. That even though he snores (and let’s face it, sometimes you do too), your favorite thing is waking up in the middle of the night and reaching out to feel your husband next to you.  No one tells you that sometimes you’ll look over at your spouse and be so overtaken with love that it actually makes you cry. That you’ll develop little rituals that feels like “home”. Or that you’ll feel the most “yourself” in the moments when you are just sitting together, talking or listening to music or watching a favorite TV show.

And while sometimes I wish someone had told me that sometimes marriage is SO hard, I am so glad that no one really told me exactly how amazing it is, too. Because the BEST part of marriage is discovering that all on your own.

Instagram Photo Dump

I don't have much to blog about, so here are some pictures of our furbabies. (Yes, that's what I'm resorting too, people. Pictures of my cats.) 

...Come on. They are pretty cute.

One Year Later - Locks of Love

Exactly one year ago Sunday, I chopped almost 12 inches of hair from my ponytail to donate to Locks of Love. You can read about the entire process here. I kept my hair pretty short for a few months, and then decided I missed my long hair. I'd say it was around June or July that I decided to really grow it back out. I don't know that I'll ever go as long as it was right before The Big Chop but I will definitely grow it out a few more inches. I guess I'm just a "long hair person". 

Here is the progress in picture form...

Right after The Big Chop 2/12/11

2/14/12

A few people have commented that my hair seems to be growing "slower" than it did last year, but I think it's gotten pretty long considering I was still wearing it just below collar bone length until the summer! I still highly recommend this to anyone who has the will-power to grow your hair long enough to part with 10" or more. It's so rewarding!

OH - and Happy Valentine's Day! May your day be filled with LOVE!

Happy Birthday, Ryan!

Today is my darling husband’s 27^th birthday.

I’ve blogged about Ryan before. More than once. But since it’s his birthday and since he was at the top of his Amazing Husband game last night, I decided I should blog about him again.

Ryan isn’t super jazzed about his birthday. Birthdays are a HUGE deal in my family, so sometimes I have a hard time understanding why he doesn’t feel the same way. And even though he doesn’t want a big deal being made out of it…I’m going to. Because his birthday is a big deal. HE is a big deal.

Last night is a great example of one of the many reasons that Ryan is so awesome. I had been fighting serious allergies (or what I THOUGHT was allergies) for a couple of weeks, and then over the weekend developed this cough that was a little worse every day. Yesterday, about halfway through my work day, I was really feeling crummy and not quite right, so I took ½ a sick day and headed to the doctor. Sinus infection and bronchitis. Lovely. When Ryan got home to find me asleep on the couch, he was gentle and sweet, kissing me on the forehead and asking me how I was feeling and if I needed anything. When I went to bed, it was too early for him so he stayed in the living room watching TV. About an hour after I fell asleep, I had my first “coughing fit” of the night. (If you’ve ever had bronchitis, you know what I’m talking about.) Within seconds of me coming to, realizing I was hacking and coughing my head off, Ryan was right beside me with a bottle of water, rubbing my back. He sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing my back until I fell back asleep. That man…sure, there are things about him that drive me nuts sometimes (and vice versa, no doubt) but he is just wonderful. This loving, devoted, smart, TALENTED and oh-so-handsome man chose to be married to ME.

After reading an article not too long ago about a couple married 72 years who died hours apart, holding hands, I told Ryan “that has to be us”. The Civil Wars say it best, “Heaven or hell, or somewhere in between, cross your heart, to take me when you leave.” Because while it goes against the feminist outlook I have in most things, I really do need him. At the risk of sounding like the cheesiest person on the planet, he really does complete me. I feel more myself with him. I am most comfortable in his presence. We are connected, soul to soul. When he is up, I am up. When he is down, I am down. We balance each other out, we hold each other up. He is my best friend and partner in life. And even when times are tough, knowing I have him to come home to…it somehow makes the hard times feel a little more tolerable.

So yes, my love, your birthday IS a big deal. It’s a celebration of the day you were born…a day I am more thankful for than you will ever know. I know sometimes you lose sight of all the good things in our lives, but they are all around us. I love you, Ryan Matthew. And happy, happy birthday.